tempslibres - free times haiku database

Analysis of the Haiku structure

boyhood friends
home once again --
side by side

amis d'enfance
à nouveau à la maison --
côte à côte


Carol Raisfeld, USA
cco 2016-05-2

Commentaire.

Ce haïku est extrait d'un haïga représentant un cimetière militaire avec ses croix blanches alignées. Discordance entre le discours superficiel (banal) et le discours profond (absurdité du massacre d'une génération). Ce haïku acquiert sa force dans cette superposition où l'horreur de la situation est sous-jacente à la banalité de surface.

Keywords

war cemetery

Structure of this haiku.

Used techniques :

* feuilleté - Multilevel discourse, layered haiku.
Haikus with two (or more) reading levels. A first objective level referring to a situation, another underlying level saying something else. The Chinese are fond of this type of discourse with many levels.

These various levels may be conscious or unconscious.

We find a little bit of this technique consciously applied in the weather haiku. The weather element can be understood as an mention to the weather and as the element that creates the atmosphere of haiku.

The two levels of discourse are conscious and disjointed and well visible in haiku tanka, of which they form the two parts. However, they overlap in the layered haiku.

Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator

* discordance - Discordance between surface and depth.
Discordance between superfical and deep discourses. Two different discourses.

* S21 - Caesura between L2 and L3.
Caesura between L2 and L3.

All the author's haikus >>>