Analysis of the Haiku structure
a long conversation
about Mom --
slow soaking rain
(une longue conversation
à propos de Maman --
pluie lente et mouillante)
Paul David Mena, USA
Haïku meteo. L'auteur se sert de la pluie pour planter l'atmosphère et rendre perceptible le contexte. La lenteur de la pluie marque une situation qui perdure et qui n'a pas de solution. Elle est mouillante ("elle trempe") pour nous dire la prégnance du sujet sur les interlocuteurs (la famille).
Structure of this haiku.
Used techniques :
* meteo - Meteo used to create an atmosphere.
Use in a haiku segment of a reference to the weather (weather conditions) that provides more than just the mention of the weather as a background. The reference refers to a state of weather that has physical (cold rain, sudden hail, frost,...) or psychological (overcast sky, storm warning, sultry afternoon...) effects. These effects are mainly felt through the skin (contact, temperature,...); which connects the author/reader to the World (his direct environment).
The mentioned weather and its effects share a set of semes (brutality, unpredictability, "cold", psychologically oppressive climate,...) with the situation experienced by the author.
A sudden and unpleasant change of situation shares semes (brutality, unpredictability, impact) with a sudden storm, hail, cold rain. A hard time to live, a disappointment, with a cold rain. An overcast weather before the rain shares with a moment when we fear the occurrence of events that we fear.
Although the meteo is often used as a marker (kigo - word of season), it sometimes brings more than just the place in the season or the context of the moment.
* atmosphere - Atmosphere.
Something emerges from all the elements that constitute haiku: a climate, an atmosphere. The author does not state this explicitly. It is the reader who reconstructs it from his or her own experience.
This is especially true in three-segment haiku, also called "grocery list". But this effect can also be achieved in other ways.
The mention of feelings related to the weather and taste adds a multisensory dimension to the atmosphere created.
* S21 - Caesura between L2 and L3.
Caesura between L2 and L3.
All the author's haikus >>>