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Analysis of the Haiku structure

a hearse leaves
the prison compound
cold moon

un corbillard quitte
l'enceinte pénitentière
lune froide


Johnny Baranski, USA
cco 2017-12-1

Commentaire.

Haïku d'atmosphère, haïku meteo même si cela n'apparait que dans la froideur de la meteo. L3 nous dit le discours profond de l'auteur, celui des non-dits. De fait, le dscours de surface, celui qui dirait le drame d'une vie qui n'a plus pu vivre librement, est absent explicitement. Le lecteur le reconstituera aisément et se l'appropriera plus pronfondément. Une belle maîtrise de l'écriture.

Keywords

prison cold moon death hearse

Structure of this haiku.

Used techniques :


* archetype - Active archetypes.
Active presence of archetypes that have determined relationships between images. Archetypes are structures that have aggregated semes (meanings) and are patterns inherited from the collective unconscious. These are the models that we use to organize our perception of the World.

e.g. Night, Fire, Death, Fall, Frontier...

Night: gloomy, dark, cold, threatening (lack of visibility of potential dangers), dangerous (legacy of ancient times), loss of Light, linked to the Unconscious through dreams and nightmares, silent world, mysterious, unknown, populated by fantastical beings.

Effects: liainc - Binding to the Unconscious


At the level: 2-prof - Deep level
Deep and non explicit structures, active objects of the unconscious.

Description level: 6-inf - Active infrastructure (archetypes, dialectics)


* atmosphere - Atmosphere.
Something emerges from all the elements that constitute haiku: a climate, an atmosphere. The author does not state this explicitly. It is the reader who reconstructs it from his or her own experience.

This is especially true in three-segment haiku, also called "grocery list". But this effect can also be achieved in other ways.

The mention of feelings related to the weather and taste adds a multisensory dimension to the atmosphere created.

The atmosphere is mostly characterized by slow or motionless time.

Effects: liasen - Binding with sensorial feelings.


At the level: 1-surf - Surface level
Discourse, surface structures, content, subject, style.

Description level: 3-suj - Subject, content


* meteo - Meteo used to create an atmosphere.
Use in a haiku segment of a reference to the weather (weather conditions) that provides more than just the mention of the weather as a background. The reference refers to a state of weather that has physical (cold rain, sudden hail, frost,...) or psychological (overcast sky, storm warning, sultry afternoon...) effects. These effects are mainly felt through the skin (contact, temperature,...); which connects the author/reader to the World (his direct environment).

The mentioned weather and its effects share a set of semes (brutality, unpredictability, "cold", psychologically oppressive climate,...) with the situation experienced by the author.

A sudden and unpleasant change of situation shares semes (brutality, unpredictability, impact) with a sudden storm, hail, cold rain. A hard time to live, a disappointment, with a cold rain. An overcast weather before the rain shares with a moment when we fear the occurrence of events that we fear.

Although the meteo is often used as a marker (kigo - word of season), it sometimes brings more than just the place in the season or the context of the moment.

Effects: liasen - Binding with sensorial feelings.


At the level: 1-surf - Surface level
Discourse, surface structures, content, subject, style.

Description level: 3-suj - Subject, content


* S21 - Caesura between L2 and L3.
Caesura between L2 and L3.

Effects: liadyn - Binding with dynamics effects


At the level: 1-surf - Surface level
Discourse, surface structures, content, subject, style.

Description level: 2-strs - Organization, surface structures

Archetypes and dialectics

* A_Mort - Death.

Contexte de mort (deuil, décès, cimetière...) ou pulsion de mort (guerre, violence...).

* A_Lumiere - The Light.

La Lumière.
A mettre en relation avec la Lumière dans la Nuit.

* A_Voyage - The Travel.

Le voyage, la migration... Lié à la Route qui elle est plus en potentialités que le Voyage qui est action.

* D_HautBas - Up <> Down.

Une opposition entre ce qui est en Haut et ce qui est en Bas. Par exemple, le ciel et la terre, les étoiles et les lumières de la ville, les nuages et la mer...

* D_VieMort - Life <> Death.

* D_Nature - Nature versus Domesticated.


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